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She hated me so much
she spat out my come
and for a moment we looked
at that mess of half-life and saliva
on the hardwood floor
of her kitchen.
she didn't want my protein.
didn't want a part of me
to be a part of her.
It had nothing to do with taste.
It had everything to do
with hostile sex.
Sometime lovers
who hated each other,
emotional sadomasochism.
Being with her tore me like paper.
I couldn't spend this life with her, ever.
I didn't spend two more weeks with her.
But I wouldn't spend the night alone.
It felt so good
when we hurt together.